Saturday, April 4, 2009

Fool Me Once…

While I can't even pretend like people have been calling, emailing or knocking down my door wondering why I have ignored the blog, people are concerned with that thing called the Major Family Vacation coming up very quickly.

I am ashamed to say I got fooled. If there's one thing in life I can count on, its that I can't trust my grandfather, Bamps. He has got to be the most onry peorson I know. (and please forgive me that I cannot think of how to spell onry for the life of me.) Yet, when Bamps spilled to me the other day that we were going to Aruba, I ate it up. And put some chocolate icing and multi-colored sprinkles on it and told everyone about it. Of course the icing and sprinkles are figurative. Bikini season is quickly approaching.

So the final green envelope finally arrives. In my pride I read quickly, not believing when it said where it wasn't, and then finally: the big reveal.

Shame on me.

I got duped.

So without further ado, the final green envelope. A little disclaimer, this poem would be much more enjoyable for you if you could see all 30 pictures of Mingo's travels to coincide with the words. But I am without the scanner at the moment, and even if I had it that just might be too much work! So use your imagination peeps!

After being kept in a box for nearly two years

The pain and suffering almost brought me to tears!

Imagine my joy and pure delight

When I started traveling on Christmas night!

I was snuggled and cozy in a pocket just right

'til Micah reached in and squealed with fright!

She made it real clear from the very first day

I'd best pack my bags and be on my way!

To the big city down south I decided to go

I'd visit the Boston's and enjoy the show!

From the city's tall buildings to Mission Control

I learned more about toilets than I needed to know!

I fell in love with Houston from the very first glance

But I knew right away, living there, I had no chance!

Laci discovered that I'm very photogenic…

The places they took me were all very scenic!

I wasn't ready to leave but they said, "I must travel"

Everyone's ready for the clues to unravel!

So I hailed Fed Ex (I was too tired to fly!)

And headed to Aggie Land to give it a try!

I went to Bush Library to visit with Perry

Then on to Kyle Field…Whew, talk about scary!

They tried and they tried to teach me "the yell"

But after several hours I said, "Oh what the…heck!"

I met Tanner's friends and became the 12th man

They wanted me to enroll, but I had other plans!

So on to Abilene to stay with the Neinast

I'd heard that's where you live "Life to the Finest!"

Their plan to get fit I discovered real soon

Had me running on the treadmill, sweating by noon!

Making trophies by day, going to classes at night

The best part of all was the ice cream diet!

After meeting Dakota, I feared for my survival

But the very next night I was preaching a revival!

The youth group was fun, the kids were all sweet

'til Dakota changed his mind, said I'd make a nice treat!

With feathers all a flying and things in a flurry

I decided to leave, and LEAVE IN A HURRY!

Abby made me a bed and fixed what I was wear'n

She hitched me a ride and shipped me straight to Erin!

The story gets worse the further I went

Listen real closely and I'll give you a hint!

With the news of three boys, I was ready to cry

I thought, "Dear Lord no, I'm too young to die!"

Such rompin' and a stompin' you ever did see

Even Micah was ready to climb up a tree!

Adding Brody and Cash to the mixture of boys

No wonder those 5 are Deb's pride and joy!

Silly monkeys they are as you can see

My ears are still ringing from their shouts of glee!

So back in my box where it's safe and sound

I've got my "Guns Up" 'cuz I'm Raider Land bound!

Straight to the Arena I decided to go

Where the NCAA was putting on a show!

With basketballs flying all over the court

I found myself cheering just to show my support!

Watching Nate work was a sight to see

And with great pride I stood on the Double T!

As much as I love my black and red

I knew it was time to Hereford to head,

With so many Raiders in this Black family crowd

I had one thing to do to make them all proud!

To the Bell Tower I went to ring that Victory Bell

'cuz once again those Raiders, made those Aggies fail!

I overheard Carey saying that the warehouse was a zoo

And I'm here to tell you people, it's absolutely true!

He said that I'd see wildlife, I thought a party was in store

But "Lions and Tigers and Bears, Oh my", was more than I bargained for!

"These critters really scare me", I said without pride

Please send me to the Horrell's, I'll hitch my own ride!

So I landed on their doorstep as the early morning dawned

A student sweetly played, but Beethoven made me yawn!

I began working on a tune that sounded just right

'cuz a guy's gotta practice if he's singing Karaoke night!

As everyone knows, I'm such a pink hunk

So I told Tonja, "I need some new trunks!"

While all of this travelin' has been really grand

With the trip drawing close I need to work on my tan!

I finally figured out why I never get to stay

'cuz the one who ends up with me,

is the one who has to pay!

So here I am on the road again

back to the place where it all began!

My bags are packed and I'm ready to go

It's time for Bamps to shell out the dough!

I'm all worn out from my traveling days

so I'm taking a little nap,

Then I'll be ready to go again

somewhere across the map!

I've had such fun with each of you

and I promise right after my snooze,

I'll tell you exactly where we're going

you can be sure it isn't a cruise!

And it's not Aruba or Mexico

since some have been there before,

But I can give you one little clue

our hotel is right on the shore!

The Dominican you can also rule out

since the flight schedule was just such a mess,

We'd spend 2 nights in the airport

and be on the beach 2 days less!

So how about the Bahamas?

It's very close and the schedule is great!

Oh my…I'm getting so sleepy,

I guess the rest will just have to wait!


Hey there! I feel so much better now

after catching up on my zzzzs….

So back to our clues, I'll give you one more

it positively isn't Belize!

Now Costa Rica was definitely an option, we thought zipping through the rain forest would be such fun!

But Bamps said he thought we could do even better ,

I guess it was just too much mon! ($$)

Barbados and St. Martin were still in the mix

when I washed upon a beautiful shore,

I found just the place I wanted to go,

when I went to the grocery store!

So, can you believe that in this purple sack is the long awaited revealing?

The secret place we are going in May,

the one Bami and Bamps have been concealing!

We hope you've enjoyed all the fun and the games,

but in case the picture's a bit hazy,

We'll tell you the truth, no more pulling your leg,

The truth is: JAMAICAN Me Crazy!!!

From what I've heard, we were all shocked when we read the final part! No one won the $100 if they guessed it right. Which is probably best, because I'm not sure if there's another $100 to go around. Bamps called to ask the other day (the same day he fooled me) how Cody and I were doing and if we were going to make it till June. Sadly I think the hubs is smart enough to keep me around, at least until the trip is over!

Did you make it this far? I barely am awake. It's been a crazy 48 hours traveling 750 miles to hit two fairs in too short of time. I've spent last night and today with SAGE Ministries in Tyler, TX. This has been such an encouraging weekend for me. I'm planning on taking the girls in my youth group to the one in Austin and I'm hoping they'll enjoy it just as much as I have.

Oh what is that you say? You looked at the SAGE website and think it is an awesome ministry? Why yes I have to agree with you.

Say what? You want to sponsor the girls from my youth group to go to SAGE in two weeks? Oh you are crazy. But yes to answer your question they do accept credit card. Only $135 max and you'll get some bonus airline points out of it.

Our church doesn't have a lot of money. And it's only $45 to attend the conference. I'm going to cover $10 of each girls fee. So they won't have to pay that much. There's just something in me that wishes it could be free for them. Its funny how I see how the girls are starting to handle money. And it's not that the $35 will be a burden on them, I just wish we had the means of blessing them instead.

I am off to get some of the many many things done that are on my to-do list. Hope you all have a great week!

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